Yo, Bartender, Jobu Needs a Refill
Well, since I got home from playing half of a league session of hockey in one night, took a shower and am now wide awake...
I gave up any organized hockey for most of the last three years due to time and money. Now that I am back I can not score a goal to save my life. It's not like I am not getting chances. I just can't finish. In every ice hockey league I have played in this is normal. I may score one or two a season. Not the last session tough. I managed to either hit the goalie or miss the net altogether on every chance I got. Roller hockey is a different story. I was never the top scorer on the team, but, I never had problems scoring goals about once a game on average. Tonight, through my teams four losses(we were outmatched but managed to stay competitive for 3 of the 4 games) I had more GOOD scoring chances than you can count on both hands. I managed to hit the goalie or shoot it wide several times I even hit the post and crossbar, but they always bounced off the wrong way. Good news is that the wide shots were missing by fractions of an inch to a few inches, which for those of you who have played with me know is not the norm, when I used to miss I missed big. Maybe I just need someone like good ol' Charlie standing in front using his head or maybe Sean, using his nuts(the goal scoring celebration to grabbing nuts in pain to goal scoring calebration to grabbing nuts in pain celebration of that goal is one of the best all time celebrations I have ever seen). But by missing by so little it is just making it more frustrating. I am seriously about to take up voodoo or some such tactic to possibly bless my stick. Maybe then I won't miss(Okay, I'll be realistic, maybe I won't miss on every shot).
Oh well, it was one of the best nights I have had in a long time. I really miss playing hockey on a regular basis with a few of the old teammates. Hell, we even got beat in the first game by one of our old nemises(SP?). So it made me feel like I was 22 again. That will change in the morning however, when the full body stiffness sets in and I am moving around like Frankenstien.
Anyway, it's off to bed for me so I might get a decent 3 to 4 hours tonight which is 3 to 4 more than I thought I would get. Sometimes, winning just prolongs the agony. The championship game probably hasn't even started yet.
posted by Larry @ 1:41 AM
20 Comments:
As I said once before, at least you can balance on skates. To me, that makes you a winner already. (okay and this is when some cheesy-ass song starts playing in the background.)
Roy: You gonna be able to work?
ltlme: It's like bad news bears all over again.
Jenni: Yeah, the sex thing is me too.
I just bought myself a brand spakin' new softball glove. I haven't played in 8 years. But you know what? I'm going to find a league up here next summer. And I'm going to play, shitty or not.
My sister told me that I throw like a girl now. I wanted to cry. Where'd my arm go?
Pammy: It wasn't that bad. A few good defensive plays, a few good moves, a few good passes, alot of missed shots.
Jess: First of all you are a girl, so even if you were to have the best throwing mechanics in the world, you would still "throw like a girl". As long as you have fun it doesn't really matter. I may have been really frustrated nut being able to score but I had more fun out there with a few of the old teamamtes I haven't played with in years than I have had in a long time. Just enjoy yourself. I know I am about half the hockey player I used to be, because I just haven't had the time I used to to put into the game.
Sounds like you had fun... thats all that matters.
Dani, it was the a great night. You can never go wrong hanging with friends and playing hockey. Plus the tournament was raising money for another friend's travel team so all around it was a good time and productive too.
Exactly. HOCKEY! Definitely can't go wrong with HOCKEY! Damn I miss my hockey.....
OMG I had to laugh at the "Major League" reference...
"Hats for bats...keep bats warm..."
Cerrano rocked, man.
You need to get in the crease and work hard for some garbage goals and it'll get that money off.
D'oh I meant to say 'Monkey' as in monkey off your back. Seriously though just keep throwin' em' at the net and they'll start to go in. I miss Hockey too.
Mossy, I figured you would appreciate the 0-4 record. I am real close to idol worship.
Jas, I am a defenseman by trade. I do get to the crease every once in a while but for the most part my shots come from above the slot somewhere.
Larry - sometimes people just have off games. I'm sure you'll get your goals.
Just think of it this way - if you score goals, you may score some girls, as well. Just a thought . . .
Callie, thanks. Just another reason to be frustrated about not scoring. ;)
They'll both come at some point. I just have never had a drought like this before.
I think you're looking at this the right way, Larry. It's good fun and exercise and you got to hang out with buddies. What more could you ask for?
Well, okay, okay, maybe a naked chick or two on your lap, but hey, let's not be greedy here.
As for the other type of "scoring", when you find a better job that doesn't require so much of your time, I'm sure it won't take long to find some companionship. You're an awesome guy with a great sense of humour and wonderful look on life. The right girl will see that and be able to match you, insight for insight.
Keep the faith, man.
Larry,
I feel kind of bad for saying this considering all other messages including Roy's are all so peace, love and happiness messages. But you never could hit the broad side of a barn. The only game you were ever really good at was when we played cross bar. Somehow you could hit the bar every single time. Next time, sit Roy in front of the net and aim for him. At least you will get an assist.
P-Shag: The naked lady in my lap will be next weekend at a friends bachelor party.
Dougie: I tell you, the most frustrating thing is that I was missing by the tiniest of margins. I would feel better about it if I would have been missing big at least then it would not have been soooooo damn close every time.
I have all the respect in the world for D-men. Who's you fave NHL D-man?
Barrett Jackman, Scott Stevens, Al MacInnis, in no particular order.
figures. I say all these nice things to stroke Larry's ego and all he sees are the words:
naked chick in your lap.
Yer such a GUY, Larry.
pride myself on it
Post a Comment
<< Home